God Bless
the Broken Road
God Bless The Broken
Road
By:
Jamie Sommers
Email:
jamiesommers23@hotmail.com
Rated:
NC-17
Synopsis:
Carter’s flight gets cancelled and he needs a place to crash for the evening. In
doing so, they take a little walk down memory lane.
Chapter Two: A Friend in
Need
Abby
walked into her apartment and threw her keys on the table. Taking off her shoes
and socks, she walked barefoot into her bathroom and began running a shower.
With John Carter still firmly on her mind, she began stripping out of her
clothes. She removed the clip from her hair and let its long tresses tumble
down her back. She leaned over and flipped the radio’s switch to on, then
stepped into the hot shower. She let the water run down her back for a minute
then turned and got her face wet, reaching absently for the bar of soap, she
began to wash the residue of her work day from her body. She stood for a long
period of time under the running water in an attempt to relax, but relaxation
never came.
The
sound of the phone’s ringing was barely audible over the radio’s music.
Sticking her head out of the shower’s door she listened as the machine picked
up.
“Hey Abby? Are you home yet? Abby?”
He sighed, “Well I guess you’re not home yet or you’re not answering.” He
waited a second then said, “Okay… I guess I’ll try you lat…”
“NO!
Wait. John?” The phone fumbled out of her wet fingers and made a loud clunking
noise as it hit the floor.
Carter
heard her “SHIT!” and began to laugh.
“I
guess you are home?” He chuckled.
“Hey…hi…”
she held the phone up to her ear and quickly realized it was upside-down.
“Jeeeeeeeez,” she said, quickly losing patience with herself. “Carter??”
“Yup. Still here,” he smiled into the phone.
“Aren’t
you supposed to be on a plane right now?” She couldn’t believe how quickly her
heart was beating.
“They
cancelled all the flights ‘cause of the storm.”
“Storm? What st…” just as she asked the loud crackle
exploded through her phone.
“Still there?” Carter asked nervously.
“Yeah,
but I don’t think I should stay on the phone John,” she said dejectedly.
“That’s
probably wise. Mind if I come over?” He didn’t know where the question came
from. It was out of his mouth before he realized what he was saying.
“Yeah!” She said excitedly. “Sure, come on over. I’ll
just dry off…”
“Dry
off?” He interrupted her. His mind began conjuring up all kinds of thoughts it
shouldn’t be having.
“I
was in the shower when you called.” The phone line crackled again and with a
loud snap of electricity the power went out and her call was lost. Abby looked
out the window of her apartment and realized that the power had gone out all
over her neighborhood. “Great,” she sighed. “Just great.”
Her heart jumped in her chest when she heard the wrapping on her door. “Who the
hell…” she got to the door and said, “Who is it?” She sure
about answering the door in a blackout, yet alone while she was wearing a
towel.
“Abby
it’s me.”
“John?”
She couldn’t believe he was there. She opened the door up a couple of inches
and peeped through. “How the hell did you get here so fast?”
“I
called you from the front steps.” He
squinted as he looked through the crack in the door. “Ya gonna let me in or do
I have to stand out here all night?”
“OH.
Uh… yeah,” she remembered her attire, or the lack there of. “Can you just give
me a minute? I need to throw something on.”
“‘Kay,”
damn shame, he thought.
She
held her finger up and said, “one sec.”
He
listened to her scream ‘shit’ a few times and heard glass breaking right before
she threw the door open.
“Be
careful. I knocked the lamp over.”
Carter
stepped over the broken pieces and offered to pick them up as Abby searched for
a flashlight and candles.
“Ah ha! Found one,” she said triumphantly as she held
up a fat candle. “I know there’s more around here somewhere…” she flicked her
lighter and lit the candle’s wick.
Abby’s
face glowed in candlelight as she continued her search and Carter began
chuckling. “Do you know what this reminds me of?”
“What?”
She stopped her search and turned to look at him.
“Do
you remember that night you blew out the fuses?” He spoke of an evening they
had about three months before their break up. “You were running the microwave,
blow dryer and…” he tried to remember what the other item was.
“Your
computer,” she finished for him.
“That’s
right, it was my laptop. Why’d I need that again?”
“Beats me. All I know is that you were constantly
complaining about me not having one so you brought your own. Oh and by the way,
it wasn’t me that blew the fuses. It was you.”
“Yeah
well,” he said with a humble tone to his voice. “Anyway this kinda reminds me
of that night.”
Abby
began giggling and said, “Didn’t I call in sick that night?”
“Yup.”
They
both stopped what they were doing and thought about that night. The air in the
room got immediately thick with an unsettling sexual tension.
Abby
took in a deep breath as her mind floated back in time.
~~~
“I
wouldn’t plug that in if I were you,” Abby advised.
“Why not?” Carter asked as he leaned over to plug in his
notebook. “I promised Kerry I’d have this research done for her by last
Monday.”
“One
more day won’t hurt then.”
“Actually
it would. She’s got to have her paper turned in by tomorrow and all she needs is
my research.”
“Yeah
but aren’t you off today?” Abby flipped her head over and began towel drying
her long locks of hair.
“Mmmm
hmmmm,” Carter walked behind Abby and place a kiss on her exposed and moist
shoulder. “I was kinda hoping you’d take it to her.”
“What?”
She turned around and caught the towel that was around her body before it fell
completely off. Tucking it back into place she teased, “So you expect me to get
yelled at for my slacker boyfriend?”
“I’m
not a slacker. I’m just a procrastinator,” Carter joked. He placed the laptop
on the kitchen table and poured himself a cup of coffee before getting down to
business. “Do you have a longer phone cord anywhere?” He asked as he attempted
to stretch the one he brought across the kitchen table. “This one’s gonna be a
stretch.”
“Use
the one in the living room,” Abby called out before turning on the blow dryer.
Carter
got himself situated at the table with a cup of coffee and some notes that
Kerry jotted down for him. He pushed the button to turn the computer on and put
his cup of lukewarm coffee into the microwave. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZAP!!!
“WHAT
THE HELL??” Abby screamed from the bathroom.
“Whoops,”
Carter said under his breath. “It’s probably just a circuit breaker. “I’ll go
check.”
Abby
tripped over a shoe as she met up with Carter on the way to the bedroom closet
where the breaker box was located.
“Where’s
your flashlight?”
“There
may be one in the kitchen.”
“You
should really have one next to your breaker box for emergencies, ya know?”
Carter lectured.
“Well,
I wouldn’t need one if you had listened to me about plugging that computer in.”
He
was grateful that he couldn’t see the smug expression he heard in her voice.
“It’s a computer Abby. Most households have one.”
“Well
most households don’t live in a building that hasn’t been updated since the
1930’s,” she called out to him as he went on the hunt for a flashlight.
Carter
located the flashlight in a kitchen drawer and hurried back. As he held the
light up to the silver box he said, “What the hell is this?”
“You’re
asking me?”
“Well
it’s your apartment.”
“I
have no clue. I’ve never seen breakers like this before,” she reached out to
touch one and then realized that they weren’t breakers, but fuses. “Oh hell.”
“What?”
“Carter,
do you know what these are?”
“If
I knew that then it’d be fixed by now.”
“No
it wouldn’t be Carter. That’s the thing. You can only fix these if you replace
the fuse.”
“Fuse?? Did you
say fuse? What year is this thing from??”
“I
told you,” she turned to yell at him. “I live in an old building Carter. Not
all of us can live in a mansion.” She smirked.
“Ha
ha ha,” he said mockingly. “I don’t live there anymore.”
“Aww
poor baby,” Abby teased him knowing she would get the best of him. “What the
hell am I gonna do now? My hair is dripping wet; my clothes need to be ironed…
Christ!”
He
knew he had pissed her off royally and if he offered to have someone come over
to fix it that would really push her over the edge. He shone the flashlight on
her as she stood up and tried to make her way through the darkness. The light
seemed to illuminate off of her bare shoulders and when her towel fell off all
thoughts of research and fuses left his mind. “Jesus,” he said under his
breath.
“What?”
Abby turned around with enough force to cause her hair to cling to her bare
breasts. “What are you mumbling about over there?”
Carter
stood up and started towards her, stopping her hand before she could pick the
towel back up and cover her beauty.
“John,”
as she looked into his eyes there was a familiar glitter in them which started
her heart to quicken. “What are you doing,” she barely got the words past her
lips.
He
rested his hand against her buttocks, pulling her closer to him as his lips
caressed her cheek. His soft lips touched her earlobe as he whispered, “thank
God for old buildings.”
All
of her anger melted instantly away. “Carter…John,” she returned his gentle
kiss. “I’m already going to be late.”
His
tongue found hers instantly. He began to stroke her spine with the gentle glide
of his fingertips, tracing a path from the slope of her neck to the tip of her
tailbone. His heart raced as she moaned
into his mouth.
“Christ
Carter,” she panted. “I can’t do…aaaah” her fingernails dug into his shoulders
as he closed his lips around a puckered nipple, sucking with a gentle urge.
He
pulled back and looked up into her eyes. “Call in sick.”
Their
eyes remained locked, his urging her to make the call, hers trying to come up
with reasons she shouldn’t.
“What
about your research for Kerry?”
“Kerry who?” His head tilted to the side and he ran his
closed lips across the tip of her breast.
Her
heart jumped as though he ran an electric cable across her skin. “Okay,” she
sighed. In all of her years as a nurse she had never given in to the urge of
playing hooky, but something inside of her had told her to stay home tonight.
“Okay.”
He
watched her walk sensually across the room to pick up the phone just to declare
that it wasn’t working. Before she came up with another excuse as to why she
couldn’t stay he handed her his cell. Without a word he walked into her living
room, leaving her in complete darkness, to find some candles. By the time she
handed him his cell phone back, the bedroom was glowing in candlelight. He took
the phone out of her hand and shut it off, determined to keep all distractions
away.
“I
called my landlord too,” she gulped as he walked towards her. “He said he
couldn’t get the replacement fuse here until…um…” her breathing was labored as
he brought her fingers to his lips.
“…fuse
here until…” he urged her on.
“Tomorrow.” Her eyes closed as her head fell back. “Oh God,”
she groaned as he released her hand and stroked her moist heat with the back of
his hand.
He
stood still, waiting for her eyes to lift to his.
The
palms of her hands ran up his stomach, chest and over his shoulders. “John,”
she whispered as she looked deeply into his eyes. Her fingers began divesting
him of his shirt, unbuttoning one button at a time. With each button she
released she’d let her fingers trail across the taught t-shirt he wore beneath
it. She could feel his chest muscles tighten with each touch and relax when she
opened another facet of his shirt. She allowed it to hang open for a moment
then pushed it over his shoulders letting it fall off of him. She leaned in and
placed a gentle kiss on his collarbone then trailed her moist lips up to his
jaw and down his neck while her hands plunged under his t-shirt. The desperate
need to touch his hot flesh and taste him became too much for her to handle.
“John,” she begged desperately, “Please...”
He
knew what she wanted but he wasn’t ready to give it to her yet. Not tonight.
Tonight was a night she would remember for the rest of her life. He lifted his
t-shirt over his head then picked her up and placed her on the bed.
She
laid her head back against the pillow and slightly spread her legs, certain
that he would be coming to her now. Her mind raced as he climbed on the bed
without removing his pants. She watched him as he made his way up her body,
starting at her toes.
He
placed a soft kiss on the arch of her delicate foot and ran his tongue up the
back of her leg, lifting it onto his shoulder. He looked down at her and knew
that he could spend the rest of his life like this. He wanted nothing more than
to spend it making her happy, making her moan. His fingers traced up her thigh
and across her soft pubic hair intentionally tangling them in it, then giving the soft hairs a slight tug. Her strangled
‘Ahhh’ was all he needed to hear before delving into her secret treasure. The
aroma of scented candles and her desire filled his senses as he ran his tongue
up her slit.
She
couldn’t believe he was doing this. They had sex on several occasions in which
she did this to him, but he had never done this to her. No one had. The act
always seemed so personal, more personal then the actual act of sex itself. She
had never pushed the issue with her ex-husband Richard. He didn’t volunteer for
it and she didn’t ask for it. Luka was a different story all together. He had
tried on several occasions, but to no avail. One night it had spurred on an
argument that she signaled was the beginning of the end. She just didn’t trust
anyone enough to allow this form of intimacy, but Carter…ahhh, John Carter was
a completely different story. She didn’t know why, but she knew that she could
trust him with her body, heart and soul. As his lips suckled the sensitive nub
between her moist lips, she groaned and grabbed the pillow next to her so she
could scream into it. Her fingers grabbed a handful of his hair as she pressed
his face deeper into her sex. “Oh yes,” she cried out.
His
tongue delved deep inside of her vaginal walls tasting her sweet nectar.
Lapping at her dripping, wet center, he could feel his urges bringing her on,
but he wasn’t ready to let it happen yet. He pulled away from her and inhaled
her sweet fragrance. “Oh God Abby,” he could barely control himself. He wanted
nothing more than to rip his pants off and drive himself deep inside of her
until he could go no further, but this wasn’t about raw sex, it was about
passion, her passion. He wanted to bring out a whole different side of Abby and
he knew exactly how to do it.
He
could hear her disappointed moan as he blew gently against her heat. He looked
up her naked body and watched her fingers grip the sheets against her chest.
Her jaw was set in a tense line, but he couldn’t allow her release yet. He
lifted his body up from between her legs and ran his tongue up her flat
stomach, dipping it slightly into her navel then placing a kiss across her
abdomen. He made his way up her rib cage and placed soft kisses on the under
side of breasts, running his tongue up her cleavage, then gently sucking her
jaw into his mouth. Her lips met his in a ravage kiss. The thought of her
kissing him so unabashedly with her juices covering his tongue, drove him
crazy. His attempt to keep her on the edge seemed to backfire on him. His rock
hard erection pressed into her stomach, through his pants. Her hands dove
between their bodies to remove his trousers, but he stopped her. He moved his
lips to her ear and whispered, “We have all night.” He pulled back and looked
into her eyes letting her know that tonight was going to be different from all
the others. Tonight they weren’t going to have sex; they were going to make
love. He could feel the heat pulsating from between her legs and thought about
how she squirmed beneath his touch.
His
lips continued to kiss down her body until he reached his goal. This time he
would take her to the edge of desire and let her soar. He spread her wet lips
open with his fingers, then delved in. Her groan gave
him chills as he lifted her legs up and held them back. He placed his hands on
the back of her thighs and pushed her knees towards her chest for maximum
effect. His tongue licked the juices
that dripped down her slit then back up again. He dragged his teeth across her
clit while sucking it into his mouth. Her legs began to tremble with desire as
his motions began to intensify. He dropped her legs and let them fall onto his
shoulders then took hold of her ass. Cupping the cheeks in both of his hands he
lifted her off the mattress and began flicking his tongue across her most
sensitive spot. He began an alternate motion between sucking and flicking her
clit until he heard her scream into the night. He looked up her trembling body
and watched her head toss back and forth from side to side as he continued with
his erotic torture.
With
one final cry she arched her back and lifted her hips to offer herself to him
completely. Her legs quivered like jelly as her heart raced. “Oh God John,” she
moaned softly. “I’ve never let anyone…”
He
knew that already, he didn’t know how, but he knew that he was the first she
had ever granted that privilege. He smiled at her as he laid his head on the
pillow next to hers. He watched her as she floated off to sleep and smiled a
satisfied grin, knowing that they still had the rest of the night, but for
right now, she knew… she finally knew how much he loved her. She finally let
him show it. .
Abby’s
eyelids fluttered open then closed as she whispered, “I love you, too.”
~
~ ~
“So
when does your flight leave again?” She needed to remind herself that Kem
existed. She couldn’t let these old feeling resurface. She didn’t have the
strength.
“Don’t
Abby.”
“Don’t
what?”
“Don’t
change the subject.”
“I
wasn’t.”
He
tilted his head to the side and gave her a look that said, ‘I know you too
well.’
“Okay,”
she surrendered. “I was. I just feel guilty.”
“Why?”
She
looked away from him and said, “Kem.”
“What
about her?”
“You’re
moving to
“Yeah
I know that, but that doesn’t mean we can’t…”
“Oh
yes it does!” she cut him off before he could finish his thought.
“I
was going to say, that doesn’t mean we can’t reminisce.”
“Yeah
well when we reminisce I get horny so let’s not okay.”
Carter
choked on his laughter. “Horny huh?”
She
glared at him.
“I
didn’t know I still had that effect on you.”
“Shut
up Carter.”
“I’m
not doing a thing,” he said with false innocence.
She
gave him that ‘go to hell’ look and turned away from him.
“If
it helps any…” he placed his hands in his pockets and confided, “…you have that
effect on me too.”
Abby
turned and looked at him then smiled. She suddenly felt powerful. “If you’re
gonna here for a few hours then maybe we should set up some rules.”
“You’re
always making up rules. Aren’t ya?”
“What
are you talking about? If anything I’m the rule breaker remember?”
He
laughed at her and said, “Would you feel any better if I told you that Kem and
I are seeing other people?”
“Nope.”
“Okay,
then how about this…” he let his head fall and said, “this is it Abby. This is
it. You….me...
“Does
that give us the right to sleep together?” She secretly hoped that his answer
would be yes.
“I’m
not saying that we should have sex. What I’m saying is… I don’t want to pretend
that we don’t have a history or that my leaving doesn’t hurt either one of us because
it does. It hurts Abby and you know it.”
“Yeah,
it does.” She gulped her tears back. “Wow,” the sense of finality set in.
“you’re leaving….for good.” She smiled through her tears accepting the fact
that they would be opening up a lot of old wounds tonight. “So what do we do
now?”
“I’m
not sure.” He wished for a moment that they could follow their hearts instead
of their heads.
“Carter?”
“Yeah?”
“Whatta we do?”
Taking
a chance he let his feelings out. “To be honest, I was just thinking, why can’t we follow our hearts instead of our heads for once.”
“If
we had done that you wouldn’t be going to another country let alone another
woman.”
“Good
point.”
The
tension was getting thicker as their discussion continued.
“Okay,”
Abby gave into her emotions. “What the hell? I guess I can try that whole
following my heart thing once in my life.”
“It’s
not going to be easy Abby.”
“I
know.”
“There’ll
be times tonight when you’ll want to hit me or worse yet kill me.”
“Well
that’s better than sleeping with you don’t you think?”
He
looked to one side then the other and said, “Not from my point of view.” His
joke seemed to ease some of the tension that had built between them.
“Okay,
so what do we do if we want to…you know,” she said under her breath.
“I’m
not sure.” He paused before saying, “lets cross that bridge if and when we get
to it, okay?”
“Okay.”
She smiled a gentle smile and said, “Now all I have to do is stop feeling
guilty about Kem.”
“Don’t
feel guilty Abby. I don’t.”
“Seriously?”
Carter
took a deep breath and told her about the man Kem had with her in
“You
mean you went all that way to be with her and she was there with someone else?”
“Mmm
hmmm,” he nodded.
“And
you’re moving there why?”
“I’m
not sure. At the time I guess it felt right.”
“Does
it still feel right?” Her fingers seemed to entwine with his. “Do you really
want to spend your life with someone that isn’t sure?”
“Like
I said, I’m not sure either.” He squeezed her hand. “All I know is that I have
to try.”
“Why?”
“Is
this my friend asking or my ex girlfriend?” Carter grinned.
Abby
smiled with her eyes and said, “I’m always the friend Carter. I just don’t want
you waking up twenty years from now and asking yourself what if.”
“Yeah,
I kinda asked myself that earlier tonight.”
“When?”
“When I was leaving the hospital.” He swallowed. “Mark was
in the back of my mind all night tonight.”
“Mark
Greene?”
“Yup.”
Abby
stood up and took a candle with her to the kitchen. “Want something cold to
drink?” She opened the fridge and said after feeling a bottle of water,
“Okay…not quite cold…”
“Whatta
ya got?”
“Soda,
water, juice, milk although that may be questionable.”
He
stood up and joined her at the fridge. “I’ll take a coke. I’m gonna need the
caffeine.”
“Planning
on staying up late?” She asked as she handed him the cool can.
“Abby,
it is late.”
“Good
point,” she grabbed a diet version of the cola. “Hungry?”
“Eh,”
he shrugged his shoulders.
“I’ve
got some leftover fried chicken.”
Carter
thought about it for a moment then said, “Sure why not?”
“So
why was Dr. Green on your mind tonight?” She grabbed a couple of plates out of
the cupboard along with some paper toweling, and then joined Carter on the
sofa.
“I’m
not sure,” he bit into a drumstick. “I kept thinking back to when I first got
to County,” he chuckled. “God I didn’t know a damn thing back then.”
Abby
smiled and listened to him reminisce.
“The
first day I was there I was pretty sure I wouldn’t make it, but you know what?”
He looked at Abby and answered his own rhetorical question. “I did. I made it.”
“I’d
say you did more than ‘made it’ Carter,” She said with a mouthful of chicken.
“That place’ll never be the same again.”
“Nah.”
“Carter,
do you even know how important you were to that place?”
“Doctor’s
come and go Abby.”
“Yeah,
well… it’ll be hard to fill your shoes John.”
“No.
It was hard filling Mark’s shoes.”
“But
you did.”
“Me?”
he shook his head, “Nah. But I tried.”
Abby
licked her fingers and said, “You did Carter.”
“I
was really missing him today, you know,” he blew off her statement. “It was
like… I don’t know how to explain it.”
Abby
listened to his every word.
“I
walked those hallways and there was a piece of me that felt empty almost. Like I had lost my best friend or something.” He picked up
another piece of chicken from the bucket and continued. “Mark,
Abby
shook her head no.
“I
had been at County for, oh… maybe a month or two. I was Dr. Benton’s med
student back then and I was good at driving him crazy. Well this one night,
this older woman got brought to the ER and she kept singing. Show tunes
mostly.” He chuckled to himself as he thought back. “God Peter was so
frustrated with her. He dumped her on me because he couldn’t get her to shut
up. We kept asking her questions and she just kept singing. She had a pretty
good voice too. Anyway, no one knew who she was so someone…Susan I think,
called psyche to see if they could get some information from her. Eventually
one of the patients recognized her. I guess she was a famous singer in her
time.”
Abby
sat and listened, enthralled by his tale.
“So
I call her granddaughter to come and pick her up. Turns out she had Alzheimer’s
and she just…” he shrugged his shoulders sadly. “She wandered off.” He put his
trash on the table and took a swig of his drink. “There was something about
her, you know?” He paused. “She was just one of those patients that you never
forget,” he smiled as he thought of her. “I remember, she hugged me goodbye and
told me she loved me.” He sat quietly as he remember how soft her skin was and
how it smelled like warm milk. “I told her I loved her too. It was after she
left that I realized I really did love her. Guess that’s when I knew I could do
this job.”
Abby
smiled as she watched his eyes well up with tears. “Did you ever see her
again?”
“Yeah. Once. It was later on
that year. Christmastime I think, and after that…” he shrugged his shoulders as
he wondered what happened to the sweet old woman.
Abby
picked up their trash and walked into the kitchen with it. “So what happened to
her?”
“Don’t
know,” he shrugged. He looked down at his feet and mumbled, “treat and street.”
Abby
heard his soft comment and said, “That’s what an ER’s for Carter.”
He
turned and looked at her. “I know. Sometimes I just wonder about some of the
patients we’ve treated over the years.”
“Me
too and then I realize that sometimes it’s better not to know.”
“I
guess,” he played with a loose string on the sofa.
She
sat back down next to him and watched him make absent movements.
“I
do have her album though, or at least my Grandfather did,” he said with a half
smile. “When I mentioned her name to him, he had pulled out her record and told
me some great stories about how he and my Gamma had fallen in love with each
other while listening to her sing.”
“Really?”
“Yup.” Carter had remembered aloud what his
grandfather had said about the singer. “I remember when grandpa pulled out her
album,” he smiled brightly into the night. “Gamma heard the music and came into
the parlor. She hadn’t heard the song in years she said and they just smiled at
each other.” He looked into Abby’s eyes. “It was one of those moments that… I
don’t know how to explain it. I felt like I was intruding on something very
intimate.”
“That
must’ve been sweet.”
“Yeah. It was.”
They
stared at each other for a few seconds until Abby broke the silence. “You
okay?”
“Yeah. Just,” he paused. “Just
reminiscing.”
As
they continued to talk about things in their past the power flickered on for a
couple of minutes and Abby took advantage of it by calling County.
“Do
you want me to come in? You sure? Okay. If you need me
just call.” She hung up the phone and said, “Susan’s got everything under
control. I guess things slowed down a lot after the building collapse.”
“So…”
Carter stood up and walked towards her. “What now?”
“I’m
not sure.” Abby was still in her bathrobe and thought she’d go change. “Want to
watch some TV or something?” She called out from her bedroom.
“Not
really.” He called back.
“Are
you hungry?”
“Just
ate chicken remember?”
“Oh
yeah,” she walked out into the living room wearing a pair of shorts and an old
t-shirt. “Well we could…” The lights went out just as she was walking towards
her sofa. “Son of a bitch,” she complained.
“I
don’t believe this,” he walked to the window to see if the blackout was
affecting the entire neighborhood. “Looks like everybody’s out again.”
“This
is ridiculous.”
As
the power flickered back on Carter turned his head and looked at Abby standing
in her living room. She looked at him and smiled softly. There was a flash of
memory that flooded his mind of Abby standing by the admin desk, wearing a
floor length black evening gown. He knew the moment he saw her standing there
that he would never forget how she made him feel at that moment. Carter
swallowed the lump in his throat.
Abby
smiled at him and said, “Let’s hope the lights stay on this time. I’d really
hate for all of my food to go bad.” As she walked towards the refrigerator to
see if the power outage had caused the temperature inside of it to drop, she
called out to him. “So where are you staying tonight? Are you going back to
your place?”
Carter
stood, staring at her.
“Carter?”
she waited. “Carter??” she turned toward him and said, “John!” Just then the
power turned back on and stayed on.
Carter
snapped out of his euphoria and said, “Uh…what?”
“I
asked you where you were staying tonight.”
“Oh.”
“Are
you alright?”
“Uh…yeah,”
Carter shook his head, as if to clear it, and said, “I’m not sure. The airport gave
me a hotel voucher so I guess I should…” he turned his head and gestured for
the door.
“That
wasn’t a hint for you to leave or anything.” She didn’t want him to leave for
some reason. She knew that he’d have to eventually, but she just wasn’t ready for
him to be out of her life yet. “Why don’t you stay for awhile? In fact…you can
crash on the couch if you want.”
“You
sure,” he said enthusiastically.
“Yeah. No problem.”
“Did
you bring something to sleep in?”
“Yeah.”
“Why
don’t you go put your pajamas on and I’ll clean up a bit.”
“Okay.”
Carter grabbed his carry-on and walked towards the restroom. He turned back and
said, “Thanks for letting me stay Abby.”
“It’s
my pleasure.”
She
put on a pot of tea and they sat on her sofa for another hour or so. They
talked until their eyes got droopy; reminiscing about moments they shared. They
relived memories of former County doctors and nurses all the while avoiding the
one thing that they most wanted to talk about. When they finally agreed to go
to sleep, it was with remorse for neither one of them wanted to say goodnight.
They
had both said that they would talk from their hearts tonight, yet the moment
they had agreed to do that neither of them did.
Abby
handed Carter a pillow and blanket then turned and headed towards her bedroom.
She looked over her shoulder and whispered in a raspy tone, “G’nite John.”
He
looked up at her and said, just as softly, “Night Abby.”
An
hour had passed as Carter listened to the sound of the ticking clock on the
wall and wondered if Abby was still awake.
After hemming and hawing over it, he decided to get up for a drink of
water to see if she would pop her head out of her doorway. She didn’t. He sat
in frustration on the edge of the sofa then finally stood up and walked to the
bedroom door. He lifted his fist to knock, but rested his palm against the cool
doorframe instead.
You
have no right to walk into this woman’s room John, he told himself. He knew
that if he went in, there would be no turning back. He also knew that it would
have to be his move. Abby would never take it upon herself to initiate this
type of behavior. She liked Kem, respected her even, which is why she would
never come to him. He didn’t know what to do until he picked up the faint smell
of cigarette smoke.
Abby
had wanted to open the door. She knew he was standing out there, she could see
the shadow of his feet under the doorframe. There was no way she would open the
door…unless he knocked of course. He probably thinks you’re asleep, she thought
to herself. Without thinking she leaned over and pulled a cigarette out of the
pack on the nightstand, lighting it was the closest thing to inviting him in,
that she could do.
Carter
took a deep breath then let it out slowly. He gripped the doorknob and slowly
turned it. As he pushed open the door he could hear her deeply inhaling her
cigarette smoke. The soft glow of the tip illuminated her face for a moment. “I
thought you quit,” he said softly.
“Yeah…well.
I’ll put it out if it bothers you,” she offered.
“No.
It’s fine.” He walked slowly towards her bed and sat on the edge. “I couldn’t
sleep.”
“Me
either.” She just couldn’t seem to tear her eyes away from his.
“That’s
not the truth,” Carter confessed. “The truth is… I don’t want to sleep out
there.”
“Oh,”
Abby whispered. She leaned over and put her cigarette out in the ashtray on the
nightstand then turned to him and said, “Where did you want to sleep?”
Carter
tilted his head and gave her a familiar look. A look that said, ‘are you really
playing dumb with me?’
“Oh…ummm”
One last thought of Kem entered her mind. “I don’t know if I can do this
Carter.”
“I’m
not asking you to do anything, Abby. I’m not asking for sex. I just want to be
next to you.” He held his breath and
waited for her response.
~
~ ~
Abby
closed her locker door and looked at the one that was situated just a couple of
doors down. “Carter,” she sighed as she ran her hand down the cold, steel door.
“Hey,”
Susan walked into the lounge and stopped in her tracks as she gave Abby a
double look. “Whoa. What’s wrong? Why are you crying?”
“I’m
not crying,” Abby said as she wiped a tear.
“Yeah. Sure.”
“This
is ridiculous,” Abby said with a smirk on her face. “I thought I was over him.
I am over him,” she stated.
“Who? Jake?” Susan walked up to her and ran a comforting hand up
her arm.
“No,”
Abby practically laughed. “This is stupid Susan. You’re going to think I’m an
idiot.”
“No
I won’t. I promise. I’d say scout’s honor, but I’m not really sure how many
fingers to hold up,” Susan said good naturedly.
“Carter.”
Abby sniffled and wiped her fingers underneath her eyes again. “I can’t believe
I’m crying and I don’t know how to stop Susan. I honestly don’t.”
“Abby?
What happened? Did he say something before he left?” Susan was surprised at
Abby’s tears, but knew something must’ve been up if she was this upset about
Carter’s leaving.
Abby
wasn’t sure if she wanted to get into it or not, but in the end she told her
friend everything…well almost everything.
“Oh
my God, you slept with him?” Susan said with an assumptive tone to her voice.
“No,”
Abby flashed her a disappointed look. “But I wanted
to. God, I wanted to.”
“So
what happened???”
“Nothing,”
she lied. “We fell asleep in my bed then he woke up, had a cup of coffee and
left.”
“Just like that? He left?” Susan continued to fish.
“Yup. I walked him to the door, we hugged, wished each other good
luck and then he was gone.”
“Wow.”
Susan walked across the room and got a cup of coffee. “personally, I was hoping
that you two would pull your heads out of your asses and get back together,
but…” she shrugged.
“I
keep asking myself why I asked him for his key back. Why didn’t I just say,
welcome home when he got back from
“Abby,
you can’t blame yourself for that. He’s got some fault too you know. I mean he
didn’t have to run off and leave you and God knows he didn’t have to stay in
“I’m
surprised he waited so long. If it were me, I would’ve been giving him the
letter once I met his crazy mother.” Abby met Susan at the coffee machine and
poured herself a cup. “Well,” she took a deep breath. “There’s not much I can
do about it now. He’s on his way around the world to be with Kem.”
“Yeah,
I guess,” Susan said dejectedly. “But maybe…Abby? Did
you ever think that maybe he feels the same way as you and was afraid to say
it?”
“If
that were the case Susan, he wouldn’t be on a plane right now.”
“True,”
Susan let out a frustrated sigh. “You gonna be alright?” Susan asked her
friend.
“Yeah,
I’m fine.” Once again Abby found herself lying to Susan.
“Okay.” Susan started walking to the door when she
suddenly realized something, “There’s still one thing I don’t understand. Why
were you crying as though he just broke your heart? I mean…it sounds like you
two just had a friendly evening with each other.”
“I’m
guess I’m just going to miss him.”
“Yeah,
me too, but I’m not standing at my locker bawling over it. Are you sure nothing
happened between you two? There’s nothing you left out?”
Abby
looked at Susan and wondered if she should just tell her the truth. She
wondered if she should just tell her what really happened after he came into
her bedroom. “Nothing happened Susan,” instead she
lied.
As
Abby went about her day she put John Carter out of her mind. It wasn’t until
later that evening when she walked into her apartment to a ringing phone that
her heart skipped a beat. “Hello?”
“Hi Sweetheart.”
“Hi, Mom.”
Abby’s
mother began chattering away as Abby looked around her apartment. It seemed
empty…lonely. Her eyes drifted towards the unmade bed and her heart broke once
again. ‘Good bye John,’ she thought to herself. ‘I’ll miss you.’